Or make you literally fall off your chair laughing:
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Monday, July 28, 2008
Drinking Like Animals
German scientists discovered several species of mammals in Malaysia that drink fermented palm nectar, with an alcohol level near that of beer. It wouldn't be surprising except for one little fact: it's their major food source, which means they are heavy alcoholics (in human standards). I wonder why they drink? Too much stress? Or maybe they have Irish pals? (with apologies in advance to any and all Irish reading this).
Friday, July 18, 2008
Funny IRC
Ran across bash.org last night and I've been reading some random quotes from it. This is one of the best I've read so far:
lib1790: so, at this college there was an extra credit question "Is hell endothermic or exothermic"
lib1790: this is what one kid wrote:
lib1790: First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass.
If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
lib1790: As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.
lib1790: Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant.
lib1790: So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose (i.e.,Hell is exothermic).
lib1790: Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, than the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over (i.e.,Hell is endothermic).
lib1790: So which is it? If we accept the postulate given by Ms.Therese Banyan during my freshman year, "That it will be a cold night in hell before I go out with you," and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having a relationship with her, the second case cannot be true. Therefore, hell is exothermic.
lib1790: the kid was the only one who got credit
That kid rocks!
lib1790: so, at this college there was an extra credit question "Is hell endothermic or exothermic"
lib1790: this is what one kid wrote:
lib1790: First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass.
If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
lib1790: As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.
lib1790: Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant.
lib1790: So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose (i.e.,Hell is exothermic).
lib1790: Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, than the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over (i.e.,Hell is endothermic).
lib1790: So which is it? If we accept the postulate given by Ms.Therese Banyan during my freshman year, "That it will be a cold night in hell before I go out with you," and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having a relationship with her, the second case cannot be true. Therefore, hell is exothermic.
lib1790: the kid was the only one who got credit
That kid rocks!
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